Strutting her stuff.

2009-02-17T14:52:00.000+08:00

I'm here in Germany!!!!!

Anyway, will create the travel blog soon. =)

2009-01-27T21:53:00.002+08:00

OKIE!!!!!

Just a quick post before i go t bed.

First and foremost,

PRCP IS ENDING!!!!

In another 48 hrs or so, i'd be free from this playing with shit and urine business.

I have been thinking sooooo much, about my career options.

But, i won't share!

And.....

17 days to Germany!!!!!!!!

Time flies!

I've been such a sinner in this one month. Been shopping toooooooo much. Way too much.

In preparation for my looking good even when all covered up in some other country, and in preparation for my adult hood in 4 months.

Time REALLY flies.

When u're enjoying yourself, that is. I would say it's been a pretty good year, for 2008. Old things thrown (my ex!), new things come. Well, it's good riddance many a times, i'd say, for those things thrown. In chinese there's a saying that goes,

旧的不去，新的不来. (with the old gone, the new will come.)

So true.

And it's also a pretty good head start for the year 2009.

Chinese new year this year have been disappointing, well mostly because of the AngBaos.

I expected more, ok. So pathetic.

It's only enjoyable for the new year goodies part. I love pineapple tarts!

To think about it, i'm kinda busy this few days, or rather, this 2 months. Been watching 90210 and i finished it in a week. Been busy doing shopping with just a click on the mouse. Been busy talking to my faraway person. And mostly i am too tired after working to upload pictures to my blog. I'll upload them soon, and i will start a travel blog for all my trips, starting from now. I've even bought some really colourful papers to be bound together for a scrapbook for my Europe trip thoughts and pictures and what nots.

Things i have to do by Feb 6:

1. Call up KLM and bombard them with my flight questions

2. Get my SNB license ready and apply for a job

3. Do my hair and nails

4. Get appointment for Brazilian (ouch!!! again)

5. Do my eyelashes.

6. Get all my loots from all the spree organizers

7. Get all my winter wear washed (by my mum, of course.)

8. Organize my wardrobe again and start writing a packing list.

9. Activate my 3G service and autoroaming service.

10. Ask for more $$$ for my Europe trip.

11. Mineral make up for my parched skin.

I think there's more to-dos, but i just can't remember what.

OH YA OH YA!!!!!

12. Call ERMS, the owe money person. That faggot.

My muse is sick =(

And i dreamt my ex died, in the hospital where i'm working. I somehow felt happy, secretly...

Anyway, off to sleep! It's morning shift tomorrow! (horrors of horrors)

2009-01-16T20:33:00.002+08:00

Countdown to days to flying.

+ - 27 days!

Went to meet friends from Germany yesterday, who are here for vacation. A German couple. Anyway, that's not the point. The fucking point is, we chatted till late, so we had take a taxi home (for me) so i dropped them off at their hostel in Bugis. After they alight, the cabbie asked, "wah! where u go and know al these ang mohs huh!"

Fuck off la.

Does it matter where??? So i told him, "oh, u just have to party more lor, and go overseas and see more, then u will know them."

Then he started telling me about his family. I was like, shut the fuck up. First, he was telling me about his eldest son, who is studying accountancy in NUS, then was telling me how much an accountant can fetch. Then on to his second son, who is studying business when teacher says he's got the brains for science. Then his youngest son, who's waiting for A level results.

Just think. There's only 2 words that came to my mind.

SHOW OFF.

And he grumbled about how it's tough to pay for their school fees blah blah blah.

And how his son is in army.

So i was like, "since they're in army, the 2 years they are serving the nation, they should be getting some allowance for their own expenditure right."

HIM: " Where got enough! Officer/ sergeant also not enough ah!"

FUCK FUCK FUCK.

Hello, officer/ sergeant, a month earning 700+ to 1000, u tell me it's not enough? When they spent 5/7 days in camp, their food being provided? All the army boys have to do is to buy some Mister Potato, Yan Yan, Coke, Roller Coaster rings, Cheezels, Jack and Jill for their eating. When they book out in the weekends, they do nothing but rot at home, food served to them by their mom, occasionally go play LAN games and a round of billiards/ pool, watch a movie or two, AND HERE THE STUPID CABBIE IS TELLING ME $700 IS NOT ENOUGH.

What kinda bullshit is this?

Or maybe this is not his whole point of telling me $$$ is never enough.

I think he just wanna let me know that his son is an officer, the other a sergeant blah blah blah.

Ok i think it's the lack of sleep that causes the whole irritation.

Gonna sleep now. Abrupt, i know. I will dream about Cologne, Munich, Paris and Vienna now. And shopping at H&M!!!

2009-01-08T23:12:00.003+08:00

DAYS TO FLYING ALONE

Was talking to him yesterday.

That idiot!

We were talking about the trip...

And he was like, "Do u want me to come and pick u up from the airport?"

I was like, "!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

That fucker. He knows i'm fearing the traveling alone thing and him 'PS-ing' me when it comes to him coming to fetch me and yet he can make such a stupid joke out of my fears.

I was just like, "FUCK YOU."

Him: " Sorry hon. It's meant to be a joke. Bad joke."

Initially, i wanted to just bring SGD 1,500 over, and looking at the exchange rate now, it converts to approximately..... (fingers tapping on my chin) €739.

®†Ω¨⁄øπ•±‘å‚∂ƒ©ªº∆@œæ¥≈ç√µ~∫

(sorry, just have to make use of the special characters my keyboard has.)

Which i doubt will be enough for ME. ME.

So to irritate him, i went, "Oh, maybe i should just bring SGD 2,000 over. Who knows, u might not be at the airport. I shall then use the money to find a nice place to stay and get a GERMAN gentleman to take me out."

Him: "arrrgggghhh! Stop saying this! I will be there. It is the only thing i am thinking about."

HA!

Oh wells, till then. I will let you readers know if i survived the gruesome 12HRS 40MINS *PLANE ride.

* Denotes me really hating something.

Can probably blog when waiting for the 3HRS 50MINS transit time to pass.

FUCKERS. Waste my time.

The next time!

2009-01-05T23:39:00.002+08:00

COUNTDOWN TO FLIGHT FOR GERMANY

40 DAYS!

Ain't it fast?

2009-01-04T21:38:00.002+08:00

GIRLS AND GUYS,

I'm sooo sorry i have lost all the link. Those who's been here, please please please tag with your URL! Thanks soooo much!!!!

2009-01-04T21:16:00.002+08:00

COUNTDOWN TO FLIGHT FOR GERMANY

41 DAYS

I still freaking can't believe i am going! But oh wells... I've even borrowed 2 books from the library for my trip.

1. CitySpots publication: Paris

2. Eyewitness travel: GERMANY

I'd have bought them, but too bad the popular in LOT ONE sucks!

It's got all the SEA countries like HK, Macau, Thailand, Bangkok, Taiwan, China etc...

EVERYTHING BUT EUROPE

There's like, New York and Berlin, but then my main will be Germany.

Gotta get him to teach me a few German phrases.

At least how much is something! For the shopaholic in me.

There's something i know!

ich liebe dich

I just wish i will have a sudden increase in money! So i can kill my time while waiting for transit.

$$$!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Now...., PRCP is REALLY THE DISTRACTION!!!!

GOOD!

Off to ZZZZZzzzzzzzzzz.......

2009-01-03T23:30:00.001+08:00

OH MY FUCKING GOD!!!!!

I AM GOING TO GERMANY!

Countdown starts today.

42 days till departure.

2009-01-03T01:57:00.003+08:00

Yesterday, i was looking through my previous posts, from the first month this blog started. May 2006.

A lot has changed since then... Never can i expect myself to say something like "i miss my darling" again... Not with that kinda man anyway. (silly ex.)

So much has happened with men, till the extent that i've become soooo skeptical about making one my boyfriend.

Honestly, with Thomas... Every thing's still pretty much KIV.

Tomorrow, i'll be booking a ticket to fly over.

And from then, we decide about "us".

I'm still skeptical though. And it's mighty scary for me to fly over alone.

I just hope someone will be there for me. Waiting at the airport.

Truth is, i'm scared. About what exactly, i'm not sure.

Everything feels like a dream, how fast time flies.

From the day i know him, till now, and what we have been these few months. Well easy for him, he's just sitting on his couch, sleeping on his bed, driving his fast car (damn) and waiting for me at HIS STATE'S airport.

I'm Packing my luggage, throwing in the winter wear, wondering about the weather over there, if i have enough warm clothing, if i brought enough money, if he's really a good man (he is, but in times of disbelief, u know, all the doubts surfaces.), if i need to collect my luggage during transit, if my plane will crash (how many times must i tell people that i actually hate plane rides a lot a lot?), if people actually understands english...

U know, the more i think about it, the crazier it seems, the scarier it seems, the more impossible it seems, the more IT FEELS LIKE A DREAM.

BUT, I WILL NOT BACK OUT. NOT WHEN I HAVE WAITED FOR SO LONG AND HE'S WAITED FOR SO LONG FOR THIS "REUNION" (HAHA).

I just watched Gossip Girl. It's sooooo damn saddening. I can just understand how Blair feels. I used to think chick flick, romance novels, tv drama series, ARE ALL OVERRATED. Apparently not. These things (the happenings that were shown / written) are all based on real life experiences.

Oh my goodness, my whole post's getting sappy...

Nonetheless... I'm still feeling a twinge of fear, a twinge of uncertainty, a twinge of doubt.

After tomorrow, after the booking of tickets, there will be no backing out anymore.

I can imagine the day i would stand. small and alone, at Changi Airport, taking a deep breath and finally believing i am doing it.

And the day i'll stand at Cologne airport, breathing out, finally believing i have done it.

I'll wait for the latter. I'll look forward to the latter.

He'd better take care of me. He'd better be there when i'm there. He'd better be living up to my expectation of what makes a good man.

I can't believe i am seeing the man that i saw 6 months ago, in just 1.5 month's time.

OH MY FUCKING GOD.

Cologne Airport. Thank god there's only 2 terminals.

Some shopping mall in cologne

A church.

On top of that, my darling guarantees me a big city outside of Germany.

Tentatively, most probably, Paris.

Till i book my ticks!

2009-01-02T07:49:00.003+08:00

Okay... I think my new blogskin really sucks. First, it's not in black or pink....

Second, it's HELLO KITTY!

What on earth!

I mean, i like Kitty alright, but then, to use it for my blog skin..............

And, i'll be going overseas soon! Yay! Like after PRCP and my TP test, which i think i will fail.

Recently did soooooo much shopping! Esp online shopping. The amount of heels i buy..... You won't wanna know.

But i am also being a scrooge. Because i wanna save more $$$ for my europe trip.

In just 1.5 months' time....

Look!

My darling's gotten himself a car! Too bad it's in Germany.... =(

But wells. Very very soon i'll be in it.

And i have lesser than four weeks till the end of PRCP!!!!

My new year resolutions?

1. To earn lotsa money for me and my sis's boutique dream. It will be feasible.

2. To get my sweet heart back here after half a year.

3. Save more $$$ for a car!

4. Of course, the designer clothes i've been eyeing on.

5. To be more vain. What the hell, right?

That's all for the 2nd jan!

Going out with the girls later on. Can't wait.

2008-12-06T02:02:00.002+08:00

OKIE!!!!! I have decided to do a short (i hope it doesn't get draggy) post.

PRCP is into it's forth week. Or is it fifth? Okay it's fifth. Just counted. SOOOOOO FAST!!!!!

YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anyway i'm starting to like PRCP and what i am doing. Quite cool. LOOOOVE interacting with the patients. So cute, some of them. This cute malay grandmother wanted to stroke my face! Hahahaha.... CUUUUUUTE.

Okie, that's all for PRCP. Oh, my preceptor's funny and nice and drives and sometimes gave me rides home. (because he lives in the next estate.)

Note: It's not all the way home. Just to my bus stop.

Anyway he say i have the potential to be a good nurse. Have the charisma. WTF! I was like, "what? since when does charisma have got to do with the ability of being a good nurse?"

Nonsense!!!!!!!!!

Ok that's all for PRCP.

As for Thomas... He sent an SMS on tuesday saying,

"Darling... it is so white here.. i wish i could go for a walk with u through the snow..but...i am very sad....and i dont want to make u sad, but i want to be honest...the institute where i wrote my thesis offered me a phd program. the institute is very outstanding and one of the best engineering institutes in the world... not many people get this chance... and now i don't know what to do...we need to talk... MISS U SOO MUCH <3>

And did i mention this SMS totally caught me at the wrong time? I just woke up at like, 5 plus pm, after my night shift in the morning...

Needless to say i felt damn damn damn sad... So i replied,

"be a good student."

How could i still be happy if he comes back when he could've taken his phd?

It'd be waaaay too selfish. And if i were him, i will take up the offer no matter what.

He then said " Don't say that and i am so sad... i have nothing decided... and i am worried..... i never received such short message. Can we talk during the weekend?"

I was (finally!) like, "i love you, thomas. I just want the best for u. it's simple."

him: "Oh Mae, I love u too!!! And i miss you so damn much... we will talk on sat or sun if u find some time...and...nothing is decided...i also applied in SG!!!"

Me: "Baby, i can't be so selfish n b happy if u come back, when u could've taken your phd. i wont be happy if you are back. that will be too selfish and mean of me. the answer is pretty definite on my side. all i can do as your bestfriend now will be encouraging you to go for further education. the best choice is not always something we want and like. SIGH. i will miss u a lot, but i'd rather miss u than feel guilty for anything. i've not waited in vain too. =) now that i'm proud of u being offered such rare chance. i can always go over. or u can come. only for holiday. =)"

Him:"noooooo... i mean... it's sweet what u are saying but... i dont wanna lose u!!! U belong to me and i DO NOT want to see or imagine u with another guy!!! SOOO SAD.

Him: "But i don't even know if i wanna do it....it will be a very stressful job!!!! let's not talk about this until the weekend..."

Me: "i dont wanna lose u too. let's talk this weekend then. too much t tell you, dunno where to start."

Him: "Same here baby... yes, we talk on the weekend =) MUUUUAAAAACK!!!! I am only think about u!!! <3"

Oh well.... So after this we were just talking over msn at night... He was telling me his mind says take up the offer, his heart says come back, and usually he let his heart wins...

And not to feel guilty if we don't work out, and that he likes this country... (WTF!!!!!!)

Yup, but still, that is not his decision yet. If he's not coming over, i'm visiting him in march. YAY!

Tour again. =)

I've already started buying winter wear! Love winter trends.

Till then! Gonna ZZZZzzzzzzz.

PM shift tomorrow. SUCKS. On a S-AT-U-R-D-A-Y.

2008-11-16T00:36:00.003+08:00

Okie, i know i know.... it's been 2 whole months (and slightly longer ) since i last updated...

EVERYBODY, I AM BACK FROM AUSTRALIA!!!!!!

Don't worry, i did not suffer any mishaps along the way, and yes, i am more than fine.

Well, maybe said too soon. The screwed up PRCP thing sucks.

PRCP: Pre-Registration Consolidation Placement

All SG nurses have to go through that before they can graduate and register for their license with the SNB (singapore nursing board).

Ok, not gonna talk about this now... First thing first. My Aussie pics! For those who haven't seen it.

Aussie trip day 1

Aussie trip day 1 sight seeing

Aussie trip day 1 Sydney aquarium

Aussie trip day 1 Opera house

Aussie trip 1st night

Aussie trip day 2 University of sydney

Aussie trip 2nd night

Aussie trip day 3 hospital visit

Aussie trip day 3 lunch and shopping

Aussie trip day 4 Hospital and Home for elders visit

Aussie trip 4th night

Aussie trip day 5 Sand toboggan and 4 wheel drive

Aussie trip day 5 Dolphin cruise

Aussie trip 5th night

Aussie trip day 6

Aussie trip departure back to SG

The rest of sydney pics

Oh my! i feel so nostalgic even just inserting the links!

SO many pictures! We had fun, we truly did.....

If u're too lazy to look at everything, u can just look at the day five album, perhaps 4th night's album....

Ok so PRCP sucks. i will be working a regular shift thing, regular not like literally regular. I mean i will be working like any regular nurse. Day shift, evening shift, night shift, on saturdays, sundays, public holidays....

Don't u all just feel sad for me!

Such a noble job right... Respect nurses!

*hahahahaha*

And i have also arrived at this conclusion that, it's gonna be a lonely christmas this year.

After a long long time.

I can already see myself spending it with my patients.....

Oh for those who's wondering about me and TRAIN a.k.a Thomas a.k.a Hercules and why is my christmas gonna be so lonely, let me reassure the concerned, that i am still waiting, waiting and waiting for him to come back. And we are still connecting with and keeping in contact with each other.

Sometimes on the phone, sometimes texting each other, a lot of times on Skype video call and MSN, and the conventional electronic mails.

Admittedly i've always thought the saying that goes "We should be thankful for having internet and emails. It helps us stay connected with family and friends" is VERY CLICHÉ.

Now i think, I WILL JUST DIE W/O IT. Ok maybe a lil exaggerated, but ya, u get the point.

He has finally finished his a-few-hundred-pages-long thesis like beginning November, and now he is looking for a job in SG. Says it's 75% chance he's coming back to SG. I'd think the 25% will happen. (germany) =(

I mean, it's better to tell yourself the negative things right? At least when it comes to this kinda situation. So u won't feel stupid and naive (that u ACTUALLY believed him) when he doesn't come back.

I HATE IT when people ask me if i have any boyfriend or anyone i like. I mean, so ambiguous! What am i supposed to tell them? So cheesy! That u are waiting for someone who u don't even know if he will definitely come back. Anyway, he is not asking me to wait. He wants me to, but knows he's got no right. I'd say i'll wait. What's there to do in this three months of torture and hell (PRCP) anyway?

And and and and and..........

we've always been CAREFULLY avoiding the "L" word. We'd be like, "oh, i love your eyes!" , "oh, i love your smile!" , "oh, i love the way u sound!". I love your this and that and that and this.

I love your everything except "u". Annoying!

In times like this, Leona Lewis' Bleeding Love's "my heart's crippled by the vein that i keep on closing" will be apt to describe my feelings.

we'd be teasing each other, like going "i l*** u..."

saying it's probably a "like", could be a "like".

And he said he'll never say something so important over chatting. Only face to face.

But but but but but....

Yesterday, 15th Nov (also Yiwen's birthday), HE FREAKING FINALLY SAID IT!

Over text. (-_-) i know.

I have not replied him, neither did i know what to reply. Shitty right. It caught me by surprise, the sms.

What do i do?

At this point in time..............

2008-09-08T03:09:00.000+08:00

YAYNESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am going to Australia today!

DOUBLE YAYNESS!!!!!!!!!!!

Because i am going with a couple of my good friends.

And who exactly are these peeps?

Rudhralekha Govindasamy Kovalakrishnan,

Deborah Anne Kwok Poh Ying

Ng Siew Kee

Lim Zhi Ling

In this case, i feel it's only appropriate to spell out their full name as in NRIC.

For if, we didn't come back after the 14th, you readers can help to report, and that makes identifying our bodies sooooooo much easier.

Or perhaps we're kidnapped.

Sorry, touch wood and CHOY, but admittedly i am never NEVER EVER a big fan of planes.

However reputable the airline is.

This instance, SIA.

Trip back will be taking A380 airbus.

COOLNESS! (But all the more i don't trust big planes.)

I will miss TRAIN sooooo sooooooooooooooo much!

And my cuuuuute niece.

Last but not least my fam and friends in SG.

I feel homesick already.............

2008-09-07T15:03:00.003+08:00

Well, as u can tell. My night at MOS.

Fucking blur picture. Must be me and my drunken hands.

If me and she wasn't smiling, i would look like i am demanding money or something from her, if not i will take her life. Hahaha!

Look, the reddish me. Because i have been drinking.

And look at the bloody ugly bra on the left. Hahaha.

Stupid girl. Just don't wear bra lah! If not, wear a nicer one.

Okie, i am just showing off my nail colour.

Zoo. Forgotten picture.

2008-08-30T15:11:00.003+08:00

This is a very important picture!!!!!

It's so gross and disgusting and incredulously funny!

It's like, picking out dried shit for the other baboon! I think it's dried shit. I mean, what else will be on the butt? Worms? EEEWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Train sms-ed and said he dreamt of me. Like 2a.m his time. Just to tell me he dreamt of me and that i am important to him. And of course missing me a lot.

MADE MY DAY!!!!

I'm so sorry that this has to be associated with the butt post. But i am just sooooo happy that i have to write something about it.

Genting trip

2008-08-30T14:35:00.005+08:00

OKAY!!!!! I WANNA COMPLAIN ABOUT BLOGGER'S UPLOAD IMAGE'S SYSTEM!

When u wanna upload images, you are only allowed to upload like, 5 at one go.

And for those who's very conscious about the sequence of the images (like what events come first) it is really difficult and time consuming to upload the images. In sequence.

No need to elaborate more. Those who's like me will get what i am trying to complain about.

Yup, so these are pictures taken when i was in Genting last sunday.

Look at the winding road. We're so high above that u can practically feel A LOT of the pressure when going up or down the road.

Look! This is the road that was constructed for all the coaches and vehicles. It's only after a turn that i realize this is the road we were on. Trust me, it is scarier than it looks.

Scary right?

So this is when we were on the way back to the malaysian custom.

The road is pitch black dark, and the driver didn't on the lights on the bus. So everything was dark. And nice. =)

Because, u can actually sleep in peace! Without the every 10m road lamps that cast stupid lights on your already closed eyelids. Like when u sleep on your dad's car in singapore.

Me and the carousel.

I hope i spelled it correct.

Ok, we were just trying to be lame.

Before we go on the indoor "roller coaster" that is not so scary.

For the weak heart in us, haha.

We wanna capture the tower, so we look a lil awkward in this picture. bending down to take it.

I seriously don't know what i was trying to do.

2008-08-29T17:02:00.002+08:00

super hot buy!

Olympus 850 SW

Love it!

Totally waterproof without any casing! Up to 3m.

Ah..... The advancement in technology!

Shock proof up to 1.5m

This is a normal picture.

With the panorama feature, this is how it can look like:

See? Good for going overseas and taking landscape. Even better than wide angle lens.

The way the camera does it amazes me.

A LOT.

I love both my cameras! They complement each other.

2008-08-29T14:05:00.006+08:00

Ok, so i have been to the Zoo on tuesday. Thanks Juliana, for the ticks! =)

Me and leks. A.k.a Ruth.

I love the vivid colour of the parrot. Though they were a tad noisy.

What is this man! Crossing the road!

Everyone stopped and stare.

Big, fat, not appealing Hippo.

See the baboon at the far right of the picture? The extremely white one, with the fur soooo frizzy (yikes)? It looks like it's the Grandpa of all the baboons. So old and wise.

Their fur really really sucks. If i am zookeeper, i will not want to take care of them. Unless i have a fetish for frizzy fur. Which i seriously doubt i will.

Yucks. He/she's like, picking out fleas for the younger one!

Look at that! That's the way she teaches her kid! By pulling the tail? Hahaha....

Not to mention the other baboon whose only it's butt is seen in this shot. PERSISTENTLY RED.

According to Ruth (i think, either her or Deb), that the red butt is to attract the opposite sex. I mean............................... I am pretty speechless.

Oh my god........ What was this facial for? Looking soooooo "shiok".

*Gulps* :s

Some sleepy goat we have here. Lazy afternoon nap.

My fave. Dance of love.

So funny when they hop, i tell you...

Look at the crowd of them! And their tails! Can't wait to see more of their cousins and relatives in australia.

This is soooooooooooo cute!

The special white tiger that debs was so crazy over.

SEE!!!!! I managed to capture the cute side of it! If u zoom it nearer, you can actually see its tongue. The cute side of an otherwise menacing and fierce animal.

Who faces extinction.

Me (and my pink highlights) together with the tiger. And part of deb. Haha.

I really love my camera for this picture. Super nice!

This is the right picture with the right animals captured on the right moment against backlight.

Another picture i love, and that makes me fall in love with my camera all over again.

I always thought the neck is straight. Didn't know it can be crooked.

Me and my fave animal.

So uncalled for, this picture.

Sooooo cute. Anyway i know why is a giraffe's neck so long. I think i told my gang the reason before.

And i so damn love my camera.

All photos taken with CASIO Exilim Ex-Z70, using various modes when suited.

Easy money

2008-08-27T14:55:00.002+08:00

Okie, this is me and my cussie Joyce @ MOS last friday.

Fucking good dancer she is. I've never danced sooooo hard in my life.

Gotten myself blisters on my feet. And also thanks to the new shoes that contributed to it.

Smart of her to wear flats!!!!

But she's tall, what to do?

Anyone taller than me i consider them tall. Haha.

Anyway, i didn't expect asking for money would be this easy!

When the people I'm asking from is my parents.

Honestly! I've been worrying about the $$$ that i need for my Australia trip and also pondering on how to actually ask for it. From my parents

After all, i am the one who told them that they will pay for the trip, and i will come up with the money that i need for spending.

So a week ago, i was like, I'm sooooooo doomed. Because it's lesser than a month to the trip and i have saved nothing for it! How typical of me. Anyway, yes, so i set my heart on asking them for some reinforcements, sponsorship, whatever u call it.

The question was, how to ask from them?

Just yesterday i did it!

Was on my dad's car, then i went like, "Father, can u sponsor me $400 for the australia trip?"

He was like, "Why? $400? "

I said, "Yup, because the whole trip's money is only inclusive of our breakfast. The rest we need to spend using our shopping money. So u're giving me the money for food. "

He's like, "Okay la, will give you when it's nearer to the trip. "

I expected him to ask me if i saved up for it too, and to let him think about it. Instead he went right into agreeing and allowing it.

Of course i am telling a big fat lie here.

The total amount needed for food, as calculated conservatively by the tour guide, is only SGD200 the most.

I just want more $$$ for shopping.

And also, how can SGD400 be enough? For my insatiable appetite for shopping?

I am putting in SGD300 on my own. (imagine, if i don't ask for help from my dad, how little i will have to spend. =(. But he gave me! Giving me. =) Yay! )

Also, SGD700 is very lil for my shopping expenses.

Say the rate is 1:1.3, SGD700 will only be AUD538.

So little! And we have to spend like AUD100 on food, leaving me with only AUD438 to survive for shopping?

For a shopaholic like me???????

Fret not, i told myself.

Now is the time when mothers play a role. In finance matters.

HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

So on the same day, yesterday, i asked from my mum. Again, the difficulty level of it shocked me.

"Mother, can you sponsor me $200 for my australia trip?"

Mother: "I sponsor u ah? Ok la, when u need it? Are u gonna do an exchange soon?"

Me: "Oh no la, not yet. Father will check out the exchange rates for me, then i will ask him to change. You can give me next week, nearer to the date. "

Then she went on and on about how i should take care of myself and that i shouldn't bath too late and sleep with wet hair...............................................

But well, i guess for the $$$, it's worth listening to her always repeating itself talk.

So now i got myself AUD700 to spend!

Well AUD600, minus the food part.

Asking for money has never been easier!

2008-08-22T00:23:00.002+08:00

Okay!!!!!!

So i finally finished my exams!

Anyway, i think i might have to take sub paper for the module today. HS 3034.

TOTALLY SUCKS.

But let's make life more interesting.

I won't talk about something that is done and over with, and not modifiable.

Gosh i nearly drowned.

First, i am not a good swimmer. Just picked up swimming 2 months ago. No stamina, no nothing.

Second, was overly ambitious today. I'm 155cm tall, should have stayed at the depth where i belong. 1.4m or something shallower.

And so we, (me, skk, ruth, julz) wanted to swim from breadth to breadth. At least half the breadth, all in a breadth.

It was fine when i started out. And i took like two other breadth. But i didn't reach the half way mark. I started spluttering and kicking and panicking. U know how people always say don't panic, but well, let them try the stupid experience of near drowning, then come back to me again to tell me if they panic.

I mean, how not to? U know that u can't stay afloat anymore, who will be sooooo calm?

I was saying, help me!

But no one heard.

Ruth claimed she heard, and she wanted to come over, and that is when she started drowning.

At first i even thought she was kidding!

She's always kidding. But i guessed not.

Ok when i was drowning it suddenly dawned on me to keep myself afloat my floating on my back, something that i am extremely good at.

So yes, i was back to the side when i saw ruth bobbing up and down.

Goodness, i was laughing!

Didn't know it's for real.

Julz was like, "what, is she serious?"

Then she and SKK started the rescue. Swam up to Ruth and pulled her to the side.

My goodness, what an escapade.

Thank god i am alive. I will train my stamina, build it up before going deep waters. SUCKS.

I am suffering from soooo much fatigue.

Still, i will go Sentosa tomorrow and have some girls' fun...

Soak up the sun!

Will upload pictures soon.

2008-08-17T18:27:00.004+08:00

Dearest bloggie, right now i am having the helluva time. Enfer d'un moment

STUDYING.

Soooooo sad!!!!!

When will this suffering period end???????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay, maybe i am exaggerating a lil.

It's end super soon. Like this coming thursday.

But but but but but......... Did i mention that the book of med surg (medical surgical) nursing is damn thick?

Printed on both sides? With six slides on a page? And with about 200 pages worth of slides?
Let's do a conservative calculation of how many slides in total that will be.

200
x 6
-----
1200

My goodness!

And the last minute studying doesn't help.

Last minute studying, without attending any lectures, DOES NOT HELP AT ALL.

In fact it will be detrimental to my results and my mental health.

My temporal constituition is like.....
screws all off.

However, i will still try to make the best out of it.

Study every page, every lecture, make own notes when necessary.

Memorize as much as i can................

That said, i should go study now.

My friends have been staying over so much lately that i can just collect some tips from them and make money out of sharing my room.

Random.

2008-08-15T00:18:00.003+08:00

Great, am i falling in love or what?

Or is it just some crush, just like ERMS, again?

I guess only time will tell. Only that this time round, everything is kinda stupid because WE are soooooo far apart,

Me and TRAIN i mean. Goodness. We like each other so much that we even made pacts.

Pact no. 1: If there's anyone else in our lives, we will tell each other. Say if we get a bf/gf.

Pact no. 2: Can't tell. :p (sorry, a dampener i know.)

Pact no. 3: Dampener too, can't tell. =)

I am not supposed to do anything physical w any other man. That i do not like, that is. As i romantic feelings kinda "like". Not that i am not supposed to, it's i don't want to. For TRAIN. Not that he told me to do this for him. But u know, when 2 people like each other, thing's just this way, and how sweet is that. (so near yet so far =( )

So same goes with him. Anyway, not much of a problem for him, as he is only into asians. Asian fetish. Haha.

He has been protective of late.

Well, what else do we say about us?

Learnt something today.

Some things are better not known.

Some things are better not told.

I really think i am falling into the vicious cycle of love again.

The one aspect that humans can't live without.

The one aspect that is capable of making one super nice and giving their all and all

YET

also capable of bringing out the ugliest of people.

And i really hate it. I will, from now on, take everything with a pinch of salt. Be it something nice, sweet or hateful that people say. Everything with a pinch of salt. Yes.

And i will refrain from falling in love. Don't be sad for me, people. I am just being happy, the way i want it to be.

Because all these time during my 4.5 years relationship with my ex, i experience nothing nice, absolutely nothing nice, about love.

Love is not accepting who the person is,

instead, a manipulation of him/her into becoming someone that u want he/she to be.

Simply by saying, "If you love me, you should __________".

(fill in the blank. i'm sure there's a lot more than just a blank.)

Love is not without jealousy.

Often people get jealous for the smallest of matters.

(girls out there, u get what i mean, i am 101% sure)

Loving someone, you will give that person freedom. NOT.

Instead, being in a relationship is like a convict in the jail. Except this time round it is 100 times worse. Your heart and soul jailed too.

Forgive and forget and start afresh.

Bullshit.

Anyone knows it is easier said than done. Often it is not done.

Forgive, yes, for those magnanimous enough.

Forget, unless thou dies.

And the past will always be brought up when quarreling.

More damage done than issues solved.

Love is compromising.

This i agree.

Typical convo: "if i can do this for u, u should be doing that for me too."

See?

All about giving and not expecting anything in return.

Double bullshit.

Really?

Sure?

100% sure?

101% sure?

See what i mean?

Typical convo again: "If u really love me, you will ______. "

Gosh, i can just go on and on and on.

Face it, those love-strucked.

Reality is, people have moved on from being nice (like a thousand years ago, B.C?) to being creatures who are self centered, who loves themselves more and detestable beings that want things done their way.

That said, yes, i am including myself when i typed the above paragraph.

How terrible is love?

U think about it, sleep on it.

I will NOT fall in love.

2008-08-14T21:43:00.001+08:00

stupid hair cut

urrrggghhhhhhh!

2008-08-09T15:34:00.005+08:00

Dearest bloggie, as you can see, i am partying again. On the eve of national day, and the eve week before my exams!!!!!!!

My goodness. Not that it'll help if i stay at home though. I'll still end up watching Gossip Girl. (GG, rather)

And yes, take a look at these pictures...

I am sooooooooo wasted.

Currently nursing a hangover with lots of sleep.

This is what happens when i am semi drunk. Unsteady hands, blur image.

Then Yiwen's the one taking it. So, steady hands, but unsteady me. Poor image quality again.

I have no idea how this picture came about. But it's soooooo artistic!

Bur again. This is shitty.

Just slightly better. And one of the reason why it is so blurry is because my phone camera's flash decided to spoil on me. But it's ok again, after i on and off. (of course the on and off part didn't occur to me when we're taking these pictures. silly me. it only cross my mind when i'm home. Stups)

Taken using my 3G front cam, explaining the total disgusting quality.

This would be the best, i'd say.

This is not bad too.

Funny.

Unsteady me again.

This, s something i ought to upload like long long ago....

Class outing at changi beach. soooooo fun!

Ok, this is the day when me and SP went swimming and he tried to drown me at the wave pool.

Isn't this interesting? i love my lap top for it's camera and the effects.

Me in OT gown. Look soooooo small. Ok, i AM small.

Changi beach again. forgot to upload photos in sequence.

My loves of my life!!!!

Mood now? Though having a hangover but extremely happy, because i did something i wanna do. Which is, i smsed TRAIN telling him i miss him, on his German number. The best part? He replied! It shows he's not some miser.

Anyway, things between me and him is so ambiguous now, that i often think about it and wonder whether i am supposed to "stay true" and wait for him and see what happens.

Seems like the attraction is mutual.

Gonna watch some more GG, then study at night.

2008-08-04T22:56:00.002+08:00

TOOOOOOOOO TIRED for a post.

Just some pictures. Neoprints i took yesterday.

Damn tired. Slept at 7a.m this morning and woke at 10a.m.

How great is that.

One thing i really hate about life is, haircuts.

And i am a damn messy person. After opening the SEXY GIRL hair conditioner, i totally can't find the cap. Lucky for me, the bottle is those using a pump, so no cap still no worries.

My room is in a mess!

Gonna sleep. Till then.

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

2008-08-04T02:08:00.000+08:00

Can't resist putting up a few more showing my curly hair.

Nighty.

2008-08-04T01:29:00.003+08:00

Hello Bloggie. I am sssoooooooooo happy.

First, gotten my allowance from dad and splurged it on curtains. And cushions, and photo frames (all from Ikea). For my room. I wanna make it look and feel as comfy as possible. So that i will be home more often . I will try to. =)

Second, went shopping today. Well technically, yesterday. It's like almost 2a.m now. Yup, gotten myself a pair of jeans (i swear i will start to wear jeans again! it's been hot u know. and i will make sure i make my money worth. though the jean's on 20% it's still NOT CHEAP you know.) and a corset. Wanted to get a strapless bra actually, but saw this super cute corset from Sorci Age by Wacoal. Another splurge.

See, that is the problem with me. I always get something that is sooo not on my shopping list. Not on my NEEDS list. ALways a WANT. Come to think about it, do i even have a "NEED" list?

Thirdly, my savings for Aussie trip coming sep has finally made some progress! Swear not gonna spend it. And will ask some sponsorship from dad for the camera. I pity my dad. Such a daughter.

Okay that's all for the happy events for this week.

Will try to spend only $30 this week. Gotta scrimp and save for AU trip. And will lug back whatever it is from AU that singapore doesn't have.

Next up, it was soooo funny just now when i went shopping with SC (20 yrs of friendship friend).

Was at PARCO BUGIS JUNCTION, Watsons had like, booths, at the atrium or space or whatever u call it, selling all the face and hair products.

So there's this booth selling all SEXY GIRLS(the brand) hair and body products. And the promotion is, buy any SEXY GIRL products and you get hair styling free. So naturally attracted to the pink and the nice packaging, i took a look. This promoter approached me and started telling me 'bout the various different products they have and the purposes they serve. Shopaholic and impulse buyers like me, ended buying a hair treatment cream.

So the point is, i got the free hairstyling.

There's gonna be a few characters involve here.

Let's name them A, B, and C.

A is the promoter whos's tryna get me to buy the products (sucessful)

B the weirdo

C the hairstylist.

NOTE THAT ALL ARE WOMEN.

SO,

A: sit down on the chair. she will style your hair

Me: sat down.

B: so pretty... (when i walk pass her.)

C: what kinda hair do you want? waves?

Me: Yup, can.

B to A: She's so pretty blah blah blah blah blah.... (referring to me. SC heard this and told me later in the night. note that this happened at 6p.m.)

C continued to do my hair.

A: Ni hen piao liang. (translates you are beautiful/ pretty/good looking in chinese)

Me: huh? haha.

After the hair styling,

C arranged my hair.

A arranged my hair.

And so i left, with my curly hair.

At 9+ p.m, walked pass the booth again.

B was giving out catalogue.

When i walked pass her and when she gave me, she went,

"so pretty..."

WTF?????!!!!!

Ok.

That is weird.

She's not a chinese for sure, she's tall and a lil fleshy. First thing that came to my mind,

TRANSGENDER.

I was telling TRAIN (needs refreshing anyone? TRAIN is the AM that i'm having a fling with) about it, and i went like,

"i didn't know i attract transgender too."

He was like, "shit... but u definitely attract me."

Sweet.

Ok that is sooooo weird.

So here i am, back at home. here's a few pics.

Me and debs. Many have said we look more and more alike. =)

And that was the day all of us did hair extensions. Like me, skk and deb.

Just smiling.

This was taken by leks when we were using SKYPE video calls

Bear love.

And that's me like an hour ago. Also over SKYPE, so it's a lil blurr.

In fact, VERY.

Stups Ruth have to take such an ugly candid shot of me when i don't know.

Reason why i am posting it is,

everyone has their ugly moments.

2008-08-02T01:04:00.001+08:00

By the way, found another interesting way of saying bad breath.

No, not stinky breath.

Nope, not halitosis.

It is.......

ill breath!!!!!!!!!!

2008-08-02T00:27:00.003+08:00

Okay... I feel bad sometimes. My dad!!!

As in he really dotes on me like, a lot. A LOT. Sometimes i just didn't realize it, and was impatient to him.

Called him on wed to ask him for allowance, and told him to put it on the table because by the time he reaches home i will probably be asleep. So he said ok. But when i woke up on thursday morning, i see no allowance on the table! He must have forgotten.

So i called him on thursday night, telling him he forgot to give me, he said he did, and he put it under my DS on the table i usually do my work. How sweet! He actually knows which table i usually do work at. (see the thing is i don't do work that often, so if he remembers which table i usually work at, he is great. ) And i, when asking him to place it on the table, was referring to the kitchen work top.

So he was like, ok, i will put it there again tonight, and are u sleeping already? I was like yeah, i am. And he was telling me to sleep early. SOOOOOOOOO sweet! Because when someone is asking you for money, will you still be in the mood to tell them to go sleep and rest early? Esp when they are still out at work?

I don't know 'bout others' fathers, but mine is a very busy one, who doesn't really make time for family, so him being nice means a lot to me. Ok i'm not sure if you guys get the gist, but yup, that's it.

Of course when he calls at night asking me to go home early is another thing on it's own.

Me and train....

We're good so far. Still talking on the MSN everyday if not every two days.

Though i see it as pointless and going nowhere. But he is certainly keen on me going Germany to visit him. See, i made a pact with him, that i will be his nurse and he will be my tour guide. How interesting.

Who knows what the future will bring?

My eczema is acting up, AND BAD, again.

Horrors of horrors!!!!!

Anyway, since my dad is so nice, i extorted money from him again! To get anther camera.

Brought my love for pink coloured stuff to a whole new level today.

Gotten yet another strand of pink highlights, this time braided in. Went with my girlies from school.

Then went Ikea to get pink and orange curtains. I just love this combination.

Hung it up already. Maybe tomorrow can get pink camera. We'll see.

2008-07-29T22:01:00.003+08:00

Okie stupid piggy face we make.

Tryna endorse the product. Haha.

That's Artistry foundation, by the way.

Ahhh.... How sweet.

Lesbian picture.

Shit i'm gonna die, NOT.

My sweetness returned.

Trying hard to look solemn.

Bad attempt, for me, as u can see a smile on the edge of appearing.

Act cute. (me la me la.)

Ok what the hell am i doing in class? Supervising people.

Just discovered this picture was taken. And i think by Juliana.

Best friend forever! BFF.

Being bimbotic.

Ever since TRAIN's (the AM) departure, no more ass to kick, so my friend's a good substitute.

NICE.....

We're calling each other.

See, this is what happens when one's had too many late nights out, drinking coffee, getting all hyped up.

I NEEEEEEDDDD MORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! coffee.

2008-07-26T15:20:00.003+08:00

First and foremost, see my bright pink highlight!!!!

Actually it's just a hair extension.

Shit, as i am typing all these my eyes are semi closed.

As of late i am always tired, though i drink a considerable amount of coffee.

All the mocha frappes at Starbucks and Coffeebean and McCafe...

IT"S NOT HELPING!

Probably been spending too much time on MSN.

From wee hours in the night till early dawn.

With my on going fling, The Train.

I've just gotten myself another two piercing on my ears.

Four holes on each side.

Oh pardon me, i think i am being soooooo random.

Right, with train, i am currently like, seeing him online. It's so stupid right...

Talking through Skype video calls.

But i thank god for this application.

Remember when he first flew back to Germany i was just like, I'm gonna miss him sooo much.

But but but, Skype changed things.

I don't miss him that much now.

Okay am i even talking sense?

Late nights have taken a toll on me and my skin.

Haha...

and this my random pic.

2008-07-24T21:11:00.008+08:00

Okay... Finally got my internet connection thing settled. Now will be able to blog more often.

Recently have been thinking sooooooo much about live (as always) and money matters.

Short of cash? Of course not.

But need MORE $$$$$....

Who doesn't?

Thinking about what i want to achieve and have and own within the next four years.

At the age of 24, owning all these, not too bad right? Quite an achievement. And what will be the "these" that i want?

These are:

1.Own a Honda Airwave (at least)

2.To have gone Europe at least once.

3.Gone Redang beach.

4.Shop in New York.

5.Being able to afford labels without having to scrimp and save every single cent, then buy the item and live on bread and water for days.

6. To live in a condominium. (this i am depending on my sister. I'm sure she can.)

7. Stayed a night (at least) in Fullerton hotel.

8. Been on the London's eye.

Honda airwave. Yes i know i said my dream car is VW Beetle cabriolet.

But but but....

This is not bad for a start.

Further more, i wanna be able to drive my family around.

Think go grocery shopping. =)

Or Ikea.

Or to the beach with Claire's bicycle.

Right now it's like this. Wanna see what i have in store for myself in the next ten years following this "these"?

1. Been to switzerland

2. Own a BMW or Porsche (with my husband or then boyfriend)

3. Landed property? Or some apartment in the city area.

4. Hopefully with a baby. (or maybe not. still can't decide whether kids are cute or irritating.)

5. Have a degree in something. (from a reputable university, DUH. Not MDIS.)

6. Have my own VW Beetle.

7. Earning minimum of 3K per month.

And i am not thinking about credit cards yet, cause apparently those banks are like money suckers. Plus, if i am really rich, i don't need to use "advance cash" for shopping.

Here's some pictures.

Craziness. Taken when i'm fucking high.

Semi drunk.

High again. But i like this pic.

Pretty nails! Darkest hand is Ruth's, Black fingernails' Deb's, bright pink's mine. (goes without saying.)

Goodnight and till then!

PS: High achiever.

2008-07-20T13:18:00.003+08:00

Craziness....

Had the longest conversation with my dad about cars.

Cars, how much they cost, and if a car costing SGD75,000, how much will the COE be, the road tax for a small car, insurance, installments, parking fees, petrol consumption, the engine c.c, maintenance.

Good gracious. And how much will all these add up to?

The installment and bank loan part, it all depends on how much is your gross salary per annum and whether or not the bank is nice to you, for the fact that they give you a loan over either a longer period (incurring more earning cause of the interest, for them) or a short period (lesser interest paid on the whole, but meaning you have to pay a lot for your car each month that you may just on the whole have to live and survive on bread.)

How cool is that? Not.

Not at all.

Thus i've come to this conclusion, that cars, or vans or lorries or trucks, AUTOMOBILES, in general, ARE FOR PEOPLE WHO ARE FREAKING RICH.

There. Point made.

BUT BUT BUT.......................

I still want a car by 2010.

Wanna OWN a car by 2010.

It's not too far from now, ain't it? Can you imagine, by then everybody will be using a HTC phone or blackberry, there will only be 3G phones and it is like the minimum anyone can own.

Gosh, i can just continue with all these... Tech freaks...

Ok so my dream car will be, VW beetle. Preferably beetle cabriolet. What else??????? Has been and will always be, until i get my hands on the steering wheel.

Then my dream car will probably be a mercedes or something higher end.

I speak as though cars are clothes.

In a way they are. People are competing against each other when it comes to cars.

Whose is more expensive? Whose is bigger?

I will definitely bling my car.

So if you see a car with some blings on it someday down the road in 2010, that would be me inside, driving it. Hopefully the car you see will be a beetle.

But if i'm not rich enough for a beetle, any Nissan or Toyota or Hyundai or Honda (yes u got it, any Japan brand) will suffice.

And i can imagine my sister complaining if i get myself a beetle.

She was so against it when i told her that's something i wanna get.

"So small! Cramp! Only two doors, wanna get in behind is difficult. Too small"

RIGHT.......

I AM PETITE, hello. Look who's driving!

U know that statement (look who's driving) is something i so damn wanna say, just to anyone, haha!

Oh my god this is fucking cool! I can use SKYPE!!!! Video calling!!!!!!

Okay, no big deal right, for most of you... Cause you guys using Windows, so definitely can use web cam and all on MSN. For me, MSN is really not up to date. Or rather, Mac's version of MSN is not up to date with Window's.

So for example, if you nudge me through MSN, i can't get the nudge. What i get is stupid MSN telling me to go download a newer version of it. Like DUH!!!! If Mac's MSN has a newer version for me, i will be the first to download.

Anyway, SKYPE is great. Love it!

2008-07-20T02:04:00.001+08:00

And that's me and TRAIN.

Was at the airport sending him off.

He looks old but he is not. Maybe i'm the one who looks young.

HAHAHAHA...

Flings 101

2008-07-20T00:35:00.002+08:00

The past few weeks have been so.... HECTIC.

With projects piling sky high (ok maybe not, i'm just exaggerating to make myself feel good that i have done some work), and exams coming up, everything is just, accumulating.

Very menacing, the datelines.

Also i have gotten myself yet another phone. LG Viewty!!! Love of my life right now. According to Ruth the tech guru, she says these kinda phones( fully touchscreen) are called candybars. And how cool is that? So cute! Haven't bling it though, except for the stylus. Just a simple straight line down it. Have learnt that less is definitely more.

ONLY for the case of blings (okay maybe sometimes more is better) and make up.

SO.... My life has been, crazy.

As usual.

And as usual i'm spending lots of time thinking how i want it to be.

What i want myself to be.

I want the simple life. Simple like, have the average boyfriend and get married (of course not now, i meant in the future.) and settle down and lead the life the average typical singaporean leads.

I also want the super interesting life of, having someone from another race or country (by another country i meant somewhere far and not from asia, and yes you guessed it someone from another race meaning "ang mohs") as a boyfriend and then get married and either stay in wherever the person comes from or stay in singapore but travel lots.

Lots and lots.

So how?

What is the verdict?

Verdict is, i'm a 180 to the first option. Though part of me wants it, but i have come to such point that i can't stop. Can't stop looking at "ang mohs".

All thanks to TRAIN.

Oh fuck, haven't told about ERMS yet.

ERMS:

He didn't ask me to be his girl at all. He conveniently just presume i wanna be his and just called me his girlfriend in front of his friends. MCP. So naturally, i dumped him.

The dumping conversation goes,

SMS to ERMS: (something like this, can't remember the exact.) Right from the start i told you i don't wanna have a relationship just yet, not now, and not in the near future. And this won't change. And you just assume that i am your girlfriend without asking me. But that doesn't matter now, because i don't wanna have a relationship. When i said we be flings, i was serious. Nothing more but flings, and when flings starts to get serious, i back out. Don't try to change me, i don't wanna get committed and you can't change me. We were never together.

He called me back and said: Do you remember who was it that ask me what's our status now? (asked him a month back and he said i'm his girlfriend)

Me: I know i was the one who asked. But do you remember YOU are the only one saying i'm your girlfriend but i didn't say anything about you being me boyfriend? (all along is him him him man, see why i wanna dump him already? Doesn't even bother bout my opinion.)

Him: okay then i'm sorry, so all along it's me who's thinking too much. (yes you.)

Me: Nah, don't say sorry, i'm at fault too. I didn't stop you when you claimed i'm your girlfriend.

(of course it's not my fault. you don't know how to read my signals and just think too highly of yourself by telling me you know i am falling in love with you as days go by. bullshit. i didn't tell you i am not because i don't wanna crush your ego. Then again, i think i crushed you already.)

Him: And can you don't use the word i love you? Cause to me it is a really strong word. (whatever! because when you first said you love me it was a week after you know me. And how is that possible to love someone within a week? naturally i don't take that seriously so when i said i love you, i wasn't serious too.)

Me: okay.

----------------------------------------------------------------

Cause for a few weeks i was already pondering why do i even think about being together with him. He is so..... SLOPPY.

Enough said. If i were to list out the reasons why i don't want him as a boyfriend, the list will reach Antarctica. Okay, exaggerating again. The list will be damn long and i would prefer to talk about it rather than typing it all out.

So, about the TRAIN. It's this ang moh (i call them the AM for short.)

Gosh now i have to type out all the details?

Nah i think i won't. Too lazy.

Just a brief insight.

Haha.

Yeah so i met this AM and me and my friends named him TRAIN. He's sweet. Spent some crazy and wild nights with him, two mornings cuddling, lots of time sms-ing. The ultimate fling. It was like a two weeks thing, maybe shorter. But nice. Short and sweet.

So that got me thinking. And Diana saying that AMs are better lovers does have an effect, somehow, on my thinking too.

What is my point?

My point is TRAIN has somehow changed my thinking a little. I want the exciting life. And after him i just can't look at chinese guys anymore. And his presence for that period made me realize i really have nothing, no feelings for ERMS at all. I must remember to thank TRAIN for that. And anyway he's left for Germany. Hometown.

Meanwhile i'm here waiting for exams to come and waiting for true love to come.

NOT.

I don't believe in love anymore. Cliche and cheesy i know, but that's the truth.

What is love? I just know it brings out people's ugly side.

Anyway relationships just get boring after awhile.

Well, till then. When i find someone.

Right now, it just gets lonelier. But i believe it'll be better. Promised Ruth that i will be a traditional chicken for now till after exams.

So, no guys for now.

I WANT AND NEED TO TRAVEL!!!!! WILL TRAVEL SOON.

2008-06-29T14:22:00.000+08:00

Insight to the next post. My house and my room.

Chokefffuuuuullllll of pictures.

2008-06-29T13:05:00.011+08:00

OKAY!!!!! Finally an update on my birthday celebration.

I took a lot of time to upload the photos in the correct sequence k!!!!

I guess that makes up for my inconsistency in blogging.

So first and foremost,

MY BIRTHDAY CAKE!!!!

28th May 2008 (Pre-birthday celebration)

Strawberry shortcake. 15cm, from Fourleaves.

My niece is so damn having fun with the box.

On the second thought, it looks like it's HER birthday!

Happy 9th month, Claire Chan. Kidding, birthday stealer.

My balloon!!!! From Elaine. With my favourite princess Ariel. Just like me, haha!

From here onwards are the pictures taken on the 29th May, (actual day ok.)

After school (yeah, so sad, birthday still have school on.), at the MRT platform going to orchard for my birthday dinner.

On the train. (obvious.)

Ruth, Deb, SKK, Me, Atiqah (front to back.)

Me and Ruth, at SUKI SUSHI.

Yup, that is where i was having my birthday dinner with them.

Cause stupid SAKAE don't have anymore seats and they don't do reservation.

What the fuck.

Deb and SKK.

Deb and her cheeky smile. HAHA.

All of us.

Me and my beau.

Gave me a birthday hug and kiss prior to the picture.

My present!

Was so damn wondering what's inside.

Opening ceremony....

SWEETS!!!!!!!

So i got a thumbdrive hidden in the mess of stars and sweets.

Together, with $110 worth of cash!!!!

How kind of my friends! They wanted to chip in for this necklace that i want to get.

Haven't gotten it yet, still waiting for gold price to drop.

Then on to the next group of friends that i met for cakes at HYATT hotel.

Posed with a piece of cake on the spoon.

Put the piece of cake in our mouth,

YUMMY!!!

My nice friends. AAWWWW...

All of us. Xue Ling, Hui Ting, Jessie, Evonne, Me!

I have no idea what was this shot all about.

Haha!!!

HA!!!!

The nice nice cakes.

Some waitress took this for us.

My dears!!!!

We look kinda squished, don't we.

And, the birthday girl reached home, satisfied and happy.

Ang Baos from my mum, dad, and Elaine and gang,

Gift set from bodyshop from Khairul. The one who is always there for me.

A letter, money wrapped in paper, and a SONY thumbdrive.

Miss sixty perfume and lotion from the cake gang.

Oh this, is a celebration after my birthday that was so uncalled for and so impromptu that i was so surprised by and my heart totally melted.

By my beau.

Cotton candy birthday cake. With a slice of strawberry cheese cake that is apparently not in this pic.

Both of us were at New York New York citylink. He secretly told the cotton candy person to make this cake. Two hearts joint together. The rest f the birthday peeps only get the mediocre regular round thing. But mine was this.

And so people (3 waiters, one manager.) suddenly came to me and sang Happy Birthday. Goodness! And ERMS sang too.

I was so... SURPRISED and SHOCKED!!! In a good way.

Okie that's all for my birthday this year.

Can't wait for the next.

PS: Diana gave me $30 to chip in for the necklace too.

Thanks all my dearest!!!! Love you guys and girls to death.

2008-06-28T12:53:00.002+08:00

I am sooo poor now i could just sell my collection of fake eyelashes for living!!!!

Birthday Post

2008-06-12T21:47:00.002+08:00

This is a day before my birthday.

Kat, Jane, Me.

Same. We're at Kbox, by the way.

There's also elaine, who is the one helping us to take the two pictures shown above.

This time round, we're cleverer to use the self timer.

Got from them a balloon and an Ang Bao.

2008-06-12T02:23:00.001+08:00

Do you lend $200 bucks to someone you only know for 2 months?

2008-06-07T11:33:00.002+08:00

Hey bloggie. I know it’s been the longest time since I last blogged. And I believe I am slowly losing a lot of my readers due to, firstly, my change in blog url, secondly, my inconsistency in updating.

Conclusion? I’m not a good blogger.

There’s soooo much to tell and to update about, that I don’t know where to start.

First and foremost, my relationship with Hsien Han has come to a standstill.

Since when????? I can just imagine a lot of people exclaiming. Since mid march. And why haven’t I mentioned it? Because we didn’t know what to say to our common friends. See, we’ve been together for so long, 4.5 years to be exact, and people, generally, expect us to eventually get married. So when it came to a halt, we, me and him, also expect people to be super shocked. And our common group of friends will feel so awkward being around us. Thus, nobody knows till end of April. And he is the one who spoiled everything. To the extend of us not talking. I’ll be wearing those scars for everyone to see too.

I’m not gonna diss him on the internet, cause my mother’s taught me better than that.

And why is that (that we are not talking) again? Cause he found out (or rather he asked ad I told him) about this other guy I know. Let’s just call this other guy I got to know as ERMS. ERMS is a restaurant manager. He is 25. Well built. Not bad looking. (I can just hear my friends protesting loudly, “yeah, to you only la!!!!”. And according to my sister, he looks like the flirtatious kind.) anyways, back to ERMS, I found him attractive. I didn’t know him at all initially, but I am the regular customer of that branch of that restaurant he is working at. Excuse me, I don’t become a regular customer just for a guy I found cute, okay. I was already a regular there. Then after that, he was then transferred over to this branch that I frequent. So I saw him 2 times at the restaurant, then I told my bestie that I found this guy cute. But my bestie didn’t know it was ERMS that I was referring to, cause both of the times I saw him, I wasn’t with my bestie. And so how did I get to know this guy? Such a long and interesting story, that made me realize that the world is such a small, small place!!!!! After that, I believed in fate too. Coincidental will be the word I’ll use to describe the way of knowing ERMS.

My bestie somehow had some connection with him, how coincidental! And so being what a bestfriend should be, she introduced me to that guy when we went to dine in.

So I was gushing already. It’s been a damn long time since I gushed about a guy, mind u. Say, 3 years? Anyway, that guy and me shook hands, the old fashion way of getting to know someone. And guess what, I could tell, the whole time while my bestie and me were eating and talking, he was looking at me. Do I enjoy it? Yes. A lot. So he tried to talk to us, and guess what!!!! He asked for number from both of us. And my funny and witty BFF straight away asked him, “Actually u only want her number right?” Oh my goodness it was so funny la! Anyway she doesn’t care, cause he’s ot her type, and she is just doing what she thinks I’ll be happy. She says seeing me having a crush on that guy and being so gushy makes her feel happy cause I am happy. (and silly) ok, so I gave my number to that guy. After that, he was just making conversation with us beside our table now and then. I can soooo damn feel his interest k. And true enough, he called me the very night.

By the way, I think that guy is too easy. I’ve expected a much harder time to get to know him.(say, going to dine in a few more times before I catch his attention and I ask for his number instead.) well that was just cheap thrills for me.

We started talking on the phone, and right now, we’re having the status of flings.

No strings attached, but I am very much still attracted to him. We fancy each other, and he has been jokingly, or rather, very subtly hinting that I should be his girlfriend. And it gets less and less subtle as weeks go by, and right now, he told me he will definitely propose to me to be his GF, and he wants that day to be memorable for both of us.

Will update more soon.

That was the bouquet my last fling gave me. The one with the girlfriend. And the girlfriend found out about us. Well, need i say more?

Random pic of me.

Cheap thrills. In the male toilet.

One of those kissy pictures i always take.

Look at my collection of fakies! And mind you, it's not the most updated collection. Haha.

2008-04-18T18:44:00.002+08:00

Okay, my life is damn screwed up.

I no longer know what i am doing anymore.

I see the things that i've done as kinda pointless.

Just yesterday i have to be such a bitch. Oh, it's not even just yesterday. Some months ago too.

What was i thinking?

People like me will be one of the reasons why adultery is committed.

Was lying on his bed yesterday and i told him i love him. He said i love you too.

Of course i don't love him. I was just testing myself, how easily can this sensitive and special word comes out of my mouth. Easy, it was.

Same goes for him i guess.

I feel like my life is kinda empty now. Suddenly.

Imagine the disappointment those around me will feel when they know what the hell i've been doing for the past one year.

It takes a lot of managing of emotions for those who are just like me.

The things we do will forever be unjustifiable to individuals who think their thoughts just the way the society, from long ago, has formatted into the human brain.

What is right and what is wrong.

Often people just like to do something wrong. Not that they accidentally committed a mistake, but they, just like me, find thrills doing the wrong things.

That the society will frown upon.

Yearns to be normal.

2008-04-14T19:58:00.002+08:00

Haha! This is another proof i have of having been to Mustafa before. =)

The stuffs there are really nice and cheap. Well maybe only to a part Indian girl like me.

Anyways, yup, Mustafa is cool! And it's 24 hours!

This is the picture to prove that we got royalty-like treatment whenever me and Ruth patronize Banana Leaf Apollo @ Little India Shopping Arcade.

Balu, or whoever that is, the guy that's damn nice, super nice to us, never fails to serve us a plate of fruits F.O.C.

Anway, don't be jealous.... It's only natural that he does it. Because we are such a regular there. Goes there like, every 2-4 weeks...

Just listen to me now, i feel so smug. HAHA!!!

Anyway, bought 17 mag just now...

At least now there's something else to entertain me other than my DS (which is doing a very good job of entertaining me recently).

Now that school's on again, it's not so boring anymore.

Something to wake up to.

I like school actually. Can see friends and catch up everyday and stuff. Well, girls.

Ok i think i will go play DS now.

2008-04-12T18:00:00.003+08:00

This is my latest effort in blinging my stuff! Thanks to the inspiration XX has given on her blog.

Nice? I did them myself leh!!!!!!

Check out two post before this and u will see my boring ipod in it's original state.

So pimped now, right?

Was doing this yesterday night. Spent around an hour.

Wasn't that difficult though cause i wasn't using tweezers. I got this thing from the same shop i bought the blings from, called magical tip, and it's really so magical la! Makes doing such nitty gritty stuff a breeze.

Anyway i think blinging your stuff is addictive. I'm definitely gonna do more of such things. Maybe to my laptop (after i get the clear casing of course! can u imagine i just do it on m laptop itself then i grew out of blings one day?), my DS and my cam.

While i was doing this yesterday, i was thinking maybe i should make a job out of pimping my gadgets.

ANYONE WHO WANTS TO GET THEIR GADGETS PIMPED WITH BLINGS, LEAVE A TAG AND YOUR EMAIL ADD OR EMAIL ME @ mae.tpr@gmail.com OKAY?

A MINIMUM OF $15- $25 ON TOP OF THE PRICE OF THE BLINGS WILL BE CHARGED BASE ON THE SIZE OF YOUR GADGET OR WHATEVER IT IS THAT U WANT TO PIMP AND THAT CAN BE PIMPED.

PRICE NEGOTIABLE.

CHEAPER THAN THOSE PUSH CARTS IN SHOPPING MALL THAT DO THIS IN RETURN FOR A LOT OF $$$$$$$$$.

And this is the back of m ipod. The four lines of blings are just to see if the colour of the blings matches with the ipod or not.

That's also my cute initial in ruby!

It may not look shiny cause of the angle i took it from, but in real it's really nice!

U know, i hope my boyfriend accepts me for who i am and accepts my love for BLINGS!

Better still, i hope he joins in my craze and let me bling his phone or something.

HAHA!!!!

2008-04-12T17:36:00.002+08:00

This is Yiwen and me! In the toilet of Meritus Mandarin.

Camwhoring of course.

Sorry for the super poor quality of the pictures. Took them using VGA sized shoots.

This is some silly idea that the girl suggested. Picture was taken by her. Special though. But i look so ugly la!

2008-04-12T17:20:00.002+08:00

See the LEGO look alike thingy? It's actually a speaker for ipod!

So cute right? Important part is it is PINK and it matches my ipod perfectly. =)

And the volume keys are actually the protruding part of the LEGO brick.

The sad thing is, i misplaced it and now everyday i look around my room wondering where it is. Sad right? =(

See these are 3 out of 6 of the bowls that comes in a set which i bought from IKEA.

And i finally got around to de-cluttering my make up corner. Now it is neater. But still, i need to look for a bigger "basket" or "tray" or whatever it is for my fakies. (a.k.a fake eyelashes)

And as u can see i have tons of mascara just for the pair of eye i have.

Oh, the big basket is from IKEA too.

Torn

2008-04-10T00:22:00.001+08:00

(Play video from video bar at the same time.)

I thought I saw a man brought to life
He was warm, he came around
Like he was dignified
He showed me what it was to cry
Well you couldn't be that man I adored

You don't seem to know,

Don't seem to care
What your heart is for
But I don't know him anymore
There's nothing where he used to lie
My conversation has run dry
That's whats going on,
Nothing's fine I'm torn

I'm all out of faith, this is haow I feel
I'm cold and I am shamed lying naked on the floor
Illusion never changed into something real
I'm wide awake and I can see the perfect sky is torn
You're a little late, I'm already torn

So I guess the fortune teller's right
Should have seen just what was there and not some holy light
To crawl beneath my veins and now
I don't care, I have no luck, I don't miss it all that much
There's just so many things that I can't touch, I'm torn

I'm all out of faith, this is how I feel
I'm cold and I am shamed lying naked on the floor
Illusion never changed into something real
I'm wide awake and I can see the perfect sky is torn
You're a little late, I'm already torn. Torn.

There's nothing where he used to lie
My inspiration has run dry
That's what's going on, nothings right, I'm torn

I'm all out of faith, this is how I feel
I'm cold and I am shamed lying naked on the floor
Illusion never changed into something real
I'm wide awake and I can see the perfect sky is torn
I've a lot of faith, this is how I feel
I'm cold and I'm ashamed bound and broken on the floor
You're a little late, I'm already torn.

Qing Ming Festival.

2008-04-06T23:01:00.002+08:00

Actually i don't think this can be called a festival la. It's quite a saddening festival.

Yup so me and my parents and my auntie and my cousins went to pay a visit to out ancestors' tomb.

Ancestors a.k.a my paternal Ah Gong and Ah Mah.

Yeah, chinese have this so called festival that requires people to go and pray and make some offerings to the ancestors (and at the same time give the one who helped look after tomb, like doing some cleaning, cutting the grass etc., the money. Their pay. ).

It got me thinking for quite a bit.

First, i think i'm gonna get my funeral picture and those that u put on the tomb ready.

I want a nice and pretty picture up there. Don't want those fierce fierce ones...

Second, i'm gonna tell my close friends and my family how i want my funeral to be, and if i want cremation on burial. But i think i'm ok with both.

Anyway my Ah Gong had his corpse buried. And my Ah Mah had hers cremated, so now hers is all a pile of remains of her bones in the urn, sitting behind some marble piece, in the wall.

So today when we went to pay a visit to her remains, my auntie and cousins (my cousins are all older than me by more than ten years, married with kids.) took out these super cute miniatures

moulded by the shape of some Dim Sum. Indians, think Tiffin. Malays, think... i don't know what. Ang Mohs or the english inclined, think Hong Kong tea time food. Uber cute la!

So back to what i thought out.

Third, tell friends and family to buy lotsa pink stuffs and cute miniatures like donuts blah blah to jazz up the marble piece in front of my urn.

I feel sad seeing my Ah Mah's picture on the marble piece... I kinda miss her, though we weren't that close when she's alive. She calls me Big Fat Girl when i was super young, like 5-6 years of age. And she always will make kueh for me to eat, then will ask if i want the filling to be peanut or bean.

She passed away when i was 15. My sec 3 year. 2003. And to date, seeing her picture still triggers my eyes to produce some tears.

Moral of the story?

5 years is not enough to get over someone whom u're not that close with.

What more a person whom u're damn close with?

And an interesting fact. For those couples who put their urn together, the man is usually the one who died earlier. Earlier than the wife 'bout ten or more years.

As for my Ah Gong, he died 1983. Five years before i was born. So seeing his picture didn't get my feelings stirred.

Very tired. Will stop here.

2008-04-05T22:12:00.003+08:00

SIGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Now is just the point of time whereby i'm speechless most of the time.

Ok, this is like my favorite song, although it's from quite long ago=)

As in this is my favorite song's lyrics.

Kinda cool.

Can click my video bar and listen to it at the same time. So empowering. Not the typical i-so-damn-need-u song.

Destiny child's Survivor

Now that you are out of my life,
I'm so much better
You thought that I'd be weak without ya,
but I'm stronger
You thought that I'd be broke without ya,
but I'm richer
You thought that I'd be sad without ya,
I laugh harder
You thought I wouldn't grow without ya,
now I'm wiser
You thought that I'd be helpless without ya,
but I'm smarter
You thought that I'd be stressed without ya,
but I'm chillin'
You thought I wouldn't sell without ya,
sold my million

I'm a survivor (what),
I'm not gonna give up (what)
I'm not gon' stop (what),
I'm gonna work harder (what)
I'm a survivor (what), I'm gonna make it (what)
I will survive (what), keep on survivin' (what)

Thought I couldn't breath without ya,
I'm inhalin'
You thought I couldn't see without ya,
perfect vision
You thought I couldn't last without ya,
but I'm lastin'
You thought that I would die without ya,
but I'm livin'
Thought that I would fail without ya,
but I'm on top
Thought that it would be over by now,
but it won't stop
Thought that I would self destruct,
but I'm still here
Even in my years to come,
I'm still gonna be here

I'm wishin' you the best,
pray that you are blessed
Much success, no stress, and lots of happiness
(I'm better than that)
I'm not gonna blast you on the radio
(I'm better than that)
I'm not gonna lie on you or your family, yo
(I'm better than that)
I'm not gonna hate on you in the magazine
(I'm better than that)
I'm not gonna compromise my christianity
(I'm better than that)
You know I'm not gonna diss you on the internet
('Cause my mama taught me better than that)

After all of the darkness and sadness,
soon comes happiness
If I surround myself with positive things,
I'll gain prosperity

Be prepared for lots of photos!!!

2008-04-03T15:22:00.004+08:00

This is from my mini shopping spree on the 31st March, Monday!

Guess where did i buy this from? Little India shopping arcade!!!

Cost only $9 and there's like 2 more hidden boxes inside this big one u know!!! Very worth it right? Though i think Ruth wouldn't think likewise, haha.

This!!!!! My loots from Far East Plaza... o nice and cute. Esp. the ice cream that i've been thinking of ever since i saw it like a month or two ago...

But now the apple is cuter! I think i kana conned though. The ice cream don't have the strap leh... Must go back and tell the auntie.

The auntie who said i look nice wearing a cap, haha. Maybe she's trying to suck up to me cause she knows i'm buying the ice cream without the strap. K lah, maybe i won't go back ad demand for the strap. =)

My stuff from the Taiwan spree finally arrived! At first me and Michelle (Bf's sister) thought we were conned by the spree organizer cause it took sooo long to have any news from the person! Like we ordered January, then after two months wich is end of March then it arrived.

As the saying goes, better late than never.

Ha! IKEA escapade with Ruth and Deb! The results? These 2 cushions, a set of 6 colorful bowls, and a basket like thingy.

BILL!

Small blue cushion $1.80

Big black cushion $3.50

Basket thingy $3.50

Set of 6 bowls $3.50

Total $12.30

DING!

Loots from US, courtesy of De-bo-rah.

VS Undies!!!!

VS Bag!!!

COACH Skinny!!!

All only amount up to SGD126.30

Deal or no deal? Deal la, of course...

...........................................................................................................

Super cute top! Not as simple as it appears k... THIS IS WHAT I'VE BEEN SEARCHING FOR FOR THE LONGEST TIME! 2-3yrs. ot the exact one i want, but still, similar will do.

Cotton On Body tube top? No la, it's a laundry bag. So nice and cute. =)

Play suit or pajamas? I've no freakin' idea.

Such a nice dress at $19.90! Love it man. Far East plaza is not such a bad place i guess.